Hi Ho, Hi Ho…It’s off to work I go!


Ah yes!  Back to the corporate grind of earning my daily bread.  I am about as un-corporate as they come though.  No power suits for this gal.  No stilettos to make me look sexy and intimidating.  Not my style.  I am trying to rock the Chic Bohemian look and in all fairness, I really don’t know what that means, however, it sounds awesome so I’ll run with it.

I’ve run this term by my daughter a few times and she just gives me THAT LOOK then rolls her eyes toward the heavens.  With a bit of petulant attitude I toss my nose in the air and saunter off.

Seriously, I am fun to work with.  I need to be organized and try to will everyone over to my way of thinking.  This seldom works but can make for interesting dynamics in the workplace.  How many executives do you know that would tell those that they work with that resistance was futile and that they will be assimilated?  My co-workers look at me strangely as I stand there smiling maniacally at them.  “Do you like Jello?”

Confused they tell me yes.

“Do you love Jello?” I ask with devilish delight.

Of course they do.  “I am Strawberry Jello…you will love me and do my bidding!”

They shake their heads and smile sympathetically at me, then disperse. Now I am beginning to think that the Jello thing is a little too old to be effective anymore, a little to passe.  I will have to conjure some other manner to take over the world, starting with my workplace.

And you should have fun while working.  God knows we spend enough time out of our day there.  Wouldn’t you love to work with a woman who fancies taking over the world?

Of course I do understand how the economy stands today.  I know how it works and all that good stuff.  I also know that the economy as it stands today is NOT sustainable.  We need to change how we do business.  Yes, I have prattled on about this topic before and likely will again.  I won’t get into it today other than this honourable mention.

It’s good to be back at work.  Good to get back to challenging myself on any given day to get this place running smoothly.  It can be done!

I am feeling stronger everyday.  My energy is increasing and the shock the body has endured from losing the reproductive organs is slowly righting itself.  On Sunday I did a Kundalini meditation that was very powerful.

Sleep is beginning to balance out.  It’ll be great when I am past all of this.  These days too, I am researching clean foods to assist through chemo and radiation that is to come.  I have been drinking a shake / smoothie daily designed to detox and provide tons of nutrients.  I’ve heard it said that chemo can wreak havoc on the digestive system and nausea is a side effect.

I want to ensure what I consume will provide a ton of nourishment.  The thing with shakes/smoothies is that they are absorbed very quickly into the system.

Well, time to get to work.  Enjoy your day!

Peace.

 

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In Training?…..My Interpretation of Sponge Bob Square Pants


 

clip-art-spongebob-2jpgThe past few days I can say with all honesty I identify with our erstwhile friend, good ol’ Sponge Bob.  I have indeed felt we may be distant relatives as I certainly have taken on the physical appearance of what a human sponge might well look like.  And Bob here is just so happy, don’t you know?  So I thought rather than bemoan and resent my current condition, I should perhaps embrace it.

In truth, I have never watched Bob’s television show so I am not certain what kind of shenanigans he gets himself into.  I gave up cartoons a few years back you see.  I had to.  It was time.

I was raised with Bugs Bunny, the Road Runner and all the Looney Tune characters.  One of my favorites that I still recall was a singing frog in a feature called ‘One Froggy Evening.’   Still makes me chuckle.

clip-art-spongebob-4I had Mickey and the gang as well in my youth.  I had a thing for Paddington Bear and I LOVE WINNIE THE POOH!  There, I said it!

During my daughter’s formative years Dark Wing Duck, Mr. Gadget and the Thundercats rocked her world.

I could not swallow Teddy Ruxpin.  I really tried but something about that bear creeped me out.  He had the voice, in my mind, of a serial killer.  Just think about Anthony Hopkins in ‘Silence of the Lambs‘ and Teddy Ruxpin’s voice and tell me that there isn’t a correlation of sorts.  And did I want my daughter listening to an animated bear that could potentially be a sociopath?  NO!

My daughter had a thing for Gem and Holograms and Ninja Turtles as well.  Then along came music and her interest in cartoons began to wane as did mine.  At twelve she bought her first CD which was ‘Green Day‘.  I was so proud.

At 13 years of age I took her to see REM.  All was good in our world.

And that, my friends, is my brief history on animated entertainment, kinda sorta.  Now I must confess that as an adult discovering ‘Pinky and the Brain‘ was a pleasure.  And for a time I viewed the ‘adult’ cartoons that were being produced.  Then finally I accepted adulthood, kinda sorta.  (The cartoons just weren’t very funny anymore)

clip-art-spongebob-1It has been a few years, I admit but I have heard good things about our friend Bob.  Now think about it.  What would it mean to be a sponge?  If you are a Germ-a-phobe, you’ll keep your distances from a sponge.  They soak up a lot of bacteria.  But here we have Bob who is a cesspool of bacteria and his pants have to be tailor made as squares to fit him.  Yet, he always seems quite pleasant and happy.

It would appear, in my rather brief research (5 minutes) that Bob hangs with someone who looks like a tongue, a snail and a cat.  An interesting and eclectic lot to be sure.

So I will, for the remainder of the time that I am in this condition remain upbeat and positive in honour of our good friend Sponge Bob.  Hell, I wouldn’t mind being a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.  Now that could be rather cool and could be whole other story as I am still thinking about Bob’s friend who looks like a tongue.

So I will steer myself back onto safe ground here.

The last dose of the medication was taken last night and with any luck my body will bounce back quickly and I will be up and running in no time.  So look for me and Bob as we run off into the sunset.  I think I want to be a blue sponge or perhaps green.  And could I wear a skirt perhaps?  The pants just look far too uncomfortable.  See you at the finish line!

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I Feel Lucky and so I am!


Yesterday I won a rather silly radio contest.  I apparently won a Klipsch iGroove Docking Station.  Cool!  I don’t have an iPod.  Probably one of the few people in the world who doesn’t and I don’t know if my new Smart Phone will work on this.  I am going through the technological learning curve at the moment.  I upgraded to a smart phone and don’t have a data plan yet and just acquired my first laptop.

So I have been gazing at these shiny new objects with a rather confused expression on my face.  But are they ever pretty!

The contest I won was titled ‘Safety Tips for Doomsday on December 21, 2012’.

The idea is that if you had a great tip for surviving the end of the world, your tip would be offered on the radio AND you would win a prize.  Of course, these tips are of the foolish and juvenile variety.  Hey, the end of the world is coming.  Let’s not take it too seriously, ‘kay?

My winning entry was this.

‘We meet at the Vancouver Art Gallery (which is in the heart of downtown Vancouver and is a common gathering place for protests and those want to smoke pot).  We meet at 10:00 AM.  There will be a giant tank of helium for us to suck on so that our voices will sound like chipmunks as we gaily sing Bob Marley’s ‘Everything is going to be okay…’

Next we pull out the slip & slides…those long and lovely pieces of yellow plastic.  Typically in Vancouver we are blessed with an abundance of rain, so it should be a muddy mess which in my mind is just perfect!  Now we will strip to our underwear and slide delightfully along the slip and slides.  At 10:59:50 we will do the ten second count down and then at precisely 11:00 AM we will partake in a massive orgy.  Yes, you heard me.  A massive orgy!

Now we could shoot for a world record.  Of course if the end of the world occurs it won’t really hold water now would it?  I told Mike Eckford that Rock 101 should make up T-shirsts that they give out after the fact.  Now that the end of world has not occurred and we have all done some crazy ass shit that we typically would not have involved ourselves in, we must have an excuse for such behaviour, yes?  And why not blame a cultural that is no longer in existence yet created this insane panic?

The T-shirts would read, Rock 101, ‘I Survived the End of the World, but the Mayans made me do it!’

Something like that.  We might as well have some fun.

On the 22nd of December the world will still be turning, we will still be here.  We need to make some very serious decisions about how we live in this world though.  And as I have stated in past posts, we need to change how we do business.  I have some ideas that are beginning to gel, but I want to let them mature a bit before I begin to put them out there.  And as always, this will be a global collaborative effort as it will effect each and everyone of us.

I will keep my rather odd sense of humour though.  Gonna need that.  Prepare for a new era.  Personally I believe it is going to be a painful delivery but birth to a beautiful age of enlightenment.  And I feel blessed that I am alive during this time to witness the end of an era and the start of a new one.  Not too many people can say that they have witnessed such an event.  I am excited at what is to come even though I don’t what is to come…it’s going to be good.

Enjoy your day everyone!

Gotta Work With Whatcha You Got


I left Delaney’s this morning with coffee and muffin in hand.  I had chatted briefly with Richard and Vickie then began to make my way back to the car.  I passed a woman whom I always see.  She is a beautiful bottle blonde.  I smiled while secretly coveting her hair.  Isn’t that like one of the commandments?  ‘Thou shalt not covet thy neighbors hair.’  Well now, it would seem I was doing a wee bit of sinning then.

Got it wrong did I?  Ah, yes…I am not supposed to covet the wife….but I can covet the hair?

I smiled at these foolish little thoughts as they bounced randomly through this brain of mine. When it comes down to it, you really have to work with what you’ve got.  I mean, what does hair really do anyway?  Were we given this as some form of torment?  Mind you…me with no hair…now that would be scary.  I guess hair is supposed to insulate us to some degree.   I don’t know. There are a lot of men who lose their hair, and there are many more who shave their heads.

Interesting.

Really all I have ever wanted is hair that will hold its shape.  That is not going to happen.  It’s funny, at the costume party on Saturday, I a sat chatting with the woman who hosted.  We went to high school together.  She was commenting on the fact that since she quit smoking a year ago, she has put on 20 lbs.  I laughed at this.  She looks fabulous by the way.  I pointed out that we are 54 years of age.  It’s not uncommon to have a bit of additional weight in this area.

I know that if followed a really strict diet for the next 4-6 months, I could take of the remaining weight that I am carrying.  It actually wouldn’t have to be that strict…I could just cut out certain things.  And I should perhaps do this simply for the health benefits.  In fact, my daughter and I started what we are calling ‘The Happiness Project’.

We designed it to help us both transition in living on our own.  I am sure that I have mentioned it, but just to recap, my daughter moved out on her own August 1, 2012.  It is the first time she has been out on her own.  We have a very close relationship and both of us have found the transition to be a rough one.  So for the next six weeks we have certain things planned.  It is designed to help with scheduling our time and for recognizing any issues that we need to work on.  I will let you know how we make out.

I do know that I have an abundance of good things about self to work with and I appreciate the fact. Yes, I go on about the hair thing.  Pathetic and trite and inconsequential, I know. It was funny though, my friend on Saturday night was complaining bitterly about her hair as well.  I of course said, ‘Oh, compared to mine your hair is gorgeous!’   To which she looked at me in shocked silence then said, ‘What!  You’ve got beautiful blonde hair…you’ve always had beautiful blonde hair!”

At this I laughed quite heartily.  Yup.  Seems many of us are never happy with the mop we were bestowed with.

I will let it be.  It is what it is.

And a little prayer out to everyone who weathered the storm on the east coast.  That storm packed one helluva wallop.  Be well everyone.

Oh…the Horror!


I did make it to the gym today though I didn’t sleep great last night.  The mind seems to be in overdrive these days.  What to do?  I am feeling a bit beat up today.  Last night I walked into a restaurant that had a polished concrete floor.  I was wearing a lovely teal dress with white kitten heels.  I looked quite eloquent, I must say.

I took one step onto the floor and I was down for the count.  Boom!  There really is no way to fall gracefully, now is there?  So I was laying there splayed out on the floor of the restaurant in all my glory….my thigh high nylons now anklets…my dress having shimmied up just a wee bit too high.  I wasn’t ready for my close up but when the moment arises we must be gracious, yes?

The host reached down and took hold of me and assisted me to my feet.  “Are you alright?” he asked with genuine concern.

I smiled at him, “Yes…I will be fine.  Just to let you know, though, it usually takes at least 10 minutes to get me on my back…you’re good!”  And we proceeded to my table with him laughing quite loudly at my comeback.

I am sporting a grapefruit size bruise on my thigh this morning, and considering that I am on blood thinners these days the damage has been exaggerated to some degree.

So I was careful at the gym this morning as I don’t want to make it worse.  But had a nice intense little session then went for a steam.  I started to take out all the things from my gym bag to get myself ready for work and horror of all horrors…I forgot my makeup bag at home!

I gasped loudly.  “No!”

Eyes widened….pupils dilated….heart rate increased….cold sweat….

No makeup…and I have to go out into the world…like this?   Fear and trepidation set in.  I began the gnashing of the teeth next then curled up in a ball and started to suck my thumb.

Okay…yes, I am once again being slightly dramatic…but only ‘slightly’ (she says with a sly smile on her face).

Funny, though how we are so used to our routines.  I feel a bit naked I must say.  I am happy to say that I am lined up for hair maintenance…so fortunately my bangs are quite long right now so I did an interesting comb over and look like Thing.  But then even with makeup on I might very well look like Thing.

There has been something I have been meaning to try…which is eyelash tinting.  So I just might give it a whirl today.  I usually have makeup on so I have never bothered.

A new adventure?

Will she have yet another crippling event regarding her appearance?

Will she ever find a hairstyle that she likes?

Will she ever learn to dress herself?

Will she ever learn how to walk in heels?

Will she just say ‘Screw it!”

Will she turn into a pirate and start to wear a patch?

Will she roam the Seven Seas now that she has found freedom from wearing makeup?

Tune in tomorrow to find out!

Well, I could go roll around in the rain today and when the authorities came to take me away then I would simply tell them it was because I forgot my makeup at home.

Enjoy your day everyone…