I am truly humbled by everyone who has offered up their best wishes and congratulations.
I feel so truly blessed at this moment.
I am recording the facts and etching the beauty of all of the love that has been afforded me through this project and throughout my life by family and friends.
I couldn’t have done the things I’ve done without them.
I was listening to the radio on the drive into work this morning. Willy and the gang were discussing this oddity that has happened with some ‘A’ listers in the entertainment industry.
Certain celebrities insist on movie sets that no one looks them in eye.
Now this is pure ego…nothing more. It is also a show of extreme insecurity in my mind.
Holding someone’s gaze is a very revealing and intimate exchange. So much can be shared in this simple act.
Yet for someone, who happens to be a well known actor / actress, to say that anyone who looks them in the eye should be immediately dismissed for their insubordination smacks of an elevated ego and a weird and convoluted idea of power.
Money can have an odd effect on people.
And the names that were mentioned today are not particularly ‘gifted’ in their field. If anything, they got lucky.
The thing is if someone scores big in a role, or happens to be stunningly beautiful or both…they are marketed like any other commodity. The problem is several of them begin to believe the ‘legend’ that they are being sold as.
I hope my book does well.
But you know, I’ve a host of other things I want to do.
A few years ago I got the idea for a fundraiser for women. I thought it might be beneficial to have an annual event to raise funds and awareness for several non-profit programs that assist women in crisis. I formatted the letter head, the idea, and took down names of organizations that would participate.
I had roughed out the schedule of events and the female celebrities that I would approach to participate.
I had letters drafted ready to be sent.
I needed to approach the venue that I wanted to use and get the skinny on that.
Then an issue arose regarding my heart. I muscled through deciding to get myself good and healthy before I continued on with this endeavor.
On the heels of the heart stuff, cancer paid a rude and uninvited visit. While I eradicated this from my life I made the decision to start my own company and launch the book.
Keep in mind I’m still working full-time and taking care of an engineering company. Gotta have a cash flow to pay the bills, you know?
Now I’ve got to figure out how to sell this book that’s I’ve just launched. What has also resurrected my attention is this fundraiser I thought of a few years back.
So I will fine tune that too.
If I sold a million books and made a boat load of cash there is this part of me that knows I would never live to excess. It’s not me.
It would of course be nice not to have to worry about financial issues but I’m not one who would run out and purchase a mansion and hire a staff to maintain it.
The idea of someone else washing my underwear is a little creepy to me, but then that’s just me. Perhaps it’s my ingrained independence. I’ve always taken care of myself…kinda sorta.
And what really is a perfect world?
Perfection doesn’t exist, not really. As much as we want that physical sense of timeless and youthful beauty with all the perceived accruements that go along with this, understand the cost for this conceit.
And when those ‘beautiful people’ who grace our movie and television screens look down at us meer normal mortals, that is typically when I lose interest…fast.
We are all connected. We always will be. To think otherwise can be very lonely.
What happens on the other side of world will have an impact on me in some form or another.
When I was invited to run in Rick Hansen’s “25th Anniversary Relay Race” and was awarded a medal as being a difference maker, I can assure you I took this honour seriously.
I want to make a difference through the power of love and forgiveness.
And I know that I’m just one woman and can only do so much.
But at this moment I feel a certain magic. And at the very beginning when I began this blog I spoke of what magic means to me
There is a radiance, a wellspring of wonder that I’m feeling.
And such a debt of gratitude to each and every person who has ever loved me.
It is this love that has sewn together a heart that was so badly broken and allowed it to heal and expand in a way I could never have imagined even a few years ago.
So thank you to all the people I know and love for encouraging me to find my voice and share it through the written word.
You have saved me.