These Moments


 

hourglass

It has snowed for three days straight here in on the West Coast.  One would think having been socked in by so much snow that it would be impossible to get around.  The thing of it though, despite this fact  there is very little snow on the ground as evidence of the weather system that stalled over our heads these past few days.

This is one of the best things about the greater Vancouver area.  We seldom have snow at sea level.  A half hour away though and you can ski to your heart’s content if that’s your passion.  The local mountains are covered in the stuff!

I like to watch people partake in this activity, however, I don’t ski.  I tried a long time ago and discovered that plunging down the side of mountain ain’t my thing.  I also have height issues.  Having an anxiety attack halfway down a steep mountain side?  I’m sure there is a fix for this.  Maybe when I’m 90 years of age I’ll tackle this fear.

sun dial

I celebrated my birthday last Saturday.  My daughter and I crawled home at 1:00 AM and I slept for a few hours then got up and watched the Olympic Men’s Hockey Gold Medal game.  Canada won the gold!  More reasons to celebrate.

I’ve passed another year and I feel great.

A posting on Facebook gave me pause.  A girl I went to school with had passed away.  Reading her obituary it became evident that she had cancer and succumbed to it.  I don’t know the type of cancer Rhonda was fighting or for how long.

At this news, I found myself wondering all the times I was at the BC Cancer Agency last year for my own treatment if she had ever been present.  Would I have known her had I seen her?  I don’t know.

We weren’t close in high school.  The last time I saw her was well over 25 years ago.  Rhonda was always impeccably dressed and spot on with her hair and make-up.  She had a sophistication and grace that at times I found intimidating.  Indeed, my perceived short-comings seemed to become glaringly evident in her presence.

When I saw the notice of her passing it was strange the emotions that were stirred.  We knew each other and hung around the same groups of people.  As with the majority of high school acquaintances, they typically remain just that.  Such was the case with Rhonda.

Perhaps the poignancy experienced is a result of having gone through the cancer thing last year as well.

Perhaps its the fact that with cancer there are only two outcomes.  You either live or die.

From the beginning, from the first utterance by the doctor of ‘You’ve got cancer’, death was not an option for me.  Yet there was most certainly a heightened awareness.

Now there is an urgency that at times borders on panic.  I want to live and do so fully engaged.  Yet I need to slow down a bit, savour these moments.

broken clock

Time is a thief, of this I am certain.  I am left with memories and I want them to be of the variety that bring a warmth to the soul, a smile to the lips.

I have these moments to just be.  Don’t over think it, don’t try to analyse it too closely.  Just feel it.  Breathe it.  Live it.  And most importantly, love it.

Funky clock

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