In Training (Day 19)….Invisible

I had a great workout this morning.  Hit the steam room after and came out resembling a freshly cooked lobster.  My muscles felt like butter which is always the point I suppose.  This is now my third week in training and I am beginning to find my groove with all of this.  I am getting into a routine and now I can begin the task of adding a little bit more of challenge each time out to build up the stamina and endurance I will need to do this thing.

It has been a stressful week.  One where I really have had to really consider which direction I want to go in regarding my career.  If I could write on a full-time basis and make a decent living at it, that would be the ultimate path I would take.  And who knows?  Maybe once I launch the book, that path will open for me.

Regarding the edit, I am at approximately 90% complete.  There are a few areas that need to be defined with more detail and context and then just the spelling and grammar corrections to polish it up and it will be good to go.  Overall I’m happy with what I have produced.  I feel that I presented a difficult story in an honest and well thought out manner.

I have learned so much through this process as well.  And I have come to a point where being treated poorly by anyone just doesn’t cut it anymore.  To be made to feel small and invisible and without worth is never acceptable.  And just because the person is under a lot of  stress does not give them an excuse to treat another person with such disregard.

Being on the receiving of this type of behaviour many times over my lifetime, I no longer remain in such volatile situations.  I extricate myself and move on.

I guess I don’t understand how someone feels that they can carry on in that manner,  particularly in a professional setting.  That my feelings just don’t matter.  That I should just suck it up.  I am not invisible. I am not incompetent and I will not entertain anyone’s attitude that deems otherwise.

I will always conduct myself professionally with courtesy and respect to the job at hand.  I will not be anyone’s whipping post.

I know many people who are treated poorly by their bosses.  For many because they need the job they put up with the bullshit.  That is the sad part of all of this.  I like my job for the most part and I do it very well.  But if someone keeps knocking you down day after day because they feel like shit and want to drag you down there with them, productivity will be affected.

And I will not be dragged into that sandbox mentality of having to prove anything to anyone.

So that has been my week.  Realizing that I have come to place where I need to move on.  And I will.

Meantime I still feel incredibly blessed with where I am at in my life and the things that I have overcome.

And life goes on as it always does and I have yet another chapter to begin.



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