Just what have I been conditioned for?  Am I in fact a fully functioning female?  At times I don’t feel like one.  At times I feel disjointed and awkward.  At times I feel less than desirable and what is it that is whispering these little lies that I tell myself?  I look in the mirror and see a woman who should be fully functional.  The body parts are all there.  The passion is there.  The love is there.  It would seem there is an issue with the programming.  Ah yes, the biggest sex organ that we all have….my illustrious grey matter….our brain.  Gotta tell right now re-programming one of these things is a bitch.

A woman whom I have worked with and come to know over the last year has just finished up her book titled ‘Shake Your Soul Song‘.  It will be available soon.  It is a book on the art of self pleasuring for women.  I have taken her erotic dance classes which I have written about and took part in a 21 day program Devi put together called ‘Shake Your Soul Song Pleasure Programme.’  She posted the cover on facebook and it looks great.

One thing I absolutely love about this woman is just how shameless she is about her sexuality.  She owns it.  I find this very inspiring.  I have been working on owning my sexuality for a few years now and I keep hitting a few glitches in the programming.

Why should we feel shame?  Why do we listen to and accept the lies that are fed to us about our feminine selves?

A few weeks ago I watched a documentary on ‘Doc Zone’ about the G-Spot.  The debate was about whether it did in fact exist.  Again the question of whether women had a point in their vaginal core where all the nerve endings came together to produce a sensational experience for a woman.  So science and the medical field have been poking about the female genitalia to discover what this mysterious zone is all about.  Turns out ladies, we all ejaculate.  Some quite noticeably, in others it is just the release of a very moist sensation…but they have discovered that it is in fact female ejaculate across the board.  Yeah!  We all cum!

It was interesting and disturbing.  Women are now going to a doctor in the L.A. area who is shooting their G-Spot full of collagen so that their G-Spot might be more swollen and sensitive.   I must tell, this horrified me.  I don’t know why I should be surprised that we are now getting out genitalia enhanced…that it would seem isn’t good enough now, it must be made even better.  This really upsets me.  To this day the biggest component in achieving the Big O is not so much the area itself, it is what begins in the brain.  That erst while piece of equipment that can make me drift off while watching some sexually appealing male across a room and imagine in detail what I would like to do to him.  That gets me excited…just the thinking about it.  That gets me turned on.  So when I am dancing around my home and shaking the damn thing, it is what I am envisioning will take place afterward that moves me into the self pleasuring aspect of all of this.

Do I want to walk around with a swollen G-Spot all day?  No, not particularly.   There is a lot more to an orgasm than just the end result.

I hope Devi’s book does well.  I hope women will read and practice what she is offering.  It is very liberating as well as fun.  It also helps you to get to know your body in a new way and appreciate its functionality.

So I will continue to re-write the programming that has for far too many years dictated my inadequacies which only exist in my mind as I have been conditioned.

I will continue to work toward being a fully functioning female and celebrate all that it means.
Enjoy your day!


One thought on “Conditioned

  1. I `met Devi Ward 2 yrs ago ,I sincerely admire her ,her work , her honesty and her sincere desire to help women , I’v taken workshops ,dance classes with her ,I too wish her huge success on her book , because she has helped me in so many ways as well


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