Tick Tock, Damn Clock


Yes, you guessed it.  If you’ve read earlier posts you will know that I have the clock radio from hell. And yes, you may be asking yourself  “Why hasn’t she replaced the thing?”

That, my darlings, is a perfectly valid question.  Indeed, I could eliminate such aggravation if I did replace it.  For those of you not too familiar with my clock radio.  It has two alarm settings and five time zone settings along with a snooze button and an AM/FM button and whole lotta other buttons on top an area mass of about 8″ x 6″.  Now I know you are already beginning to appreciate that when someone wakes in the middle of the night or goes to press the snooze button there is a great deal of room to in fact hit one of the other ten or so buttons that exist on the top of this particular clock radio.

And if you have further deduced that I have in fact done this previously, you would be correct.  And you likely now know that I did this once again this morning.  Yes, I rose from bed, put my gym clothes on, washed up and went to feed the cat.  Glanced at the clock.  6:18 AM.  “NO!”

I ran back into my room and looked at my clock.  5:11 AM. “NO!”

I must admit I accepted defeat quickly this morning but I feel cheated.  As I was slipping into my gym gear I was formulating the workout I was going to endure.  Guess I will just have to suck it up and go for a walk at lunch to try to balance this out a bit.  (Insert deep sigh here).

As to the other question of why I haven’t replaced the clock yet.  That is an interesting question.  Perhaps I have subconsciously entered into a battle of wills with an inanimate object.  Perhaps there is still that side of self that likes to be antagonized by inanimate objects.  Perhaps I feel the need to become superior to the inanimate object.  Perhaps I am thinking far too much about this.

All kidding aside, to be honest, once I have my little rant about said clock I always feel much better and I don’t really think about purchasing a clock when I am in a store.  It is kind of down at the bottom of the ladder in terms of needs.  I am currently out of butter and I forgot to buy that yesterday so I could not even make myself a sandwich this morning. (Insert trembling lip and wipe away single tear…cue the violinist).  Do you think I am being a bit too dramatic for a Monday morning?

In any case the fact that I have a functioning alarm clock owned by a human who doesn’t always function as directed, and yes, I admit that I malfunction from time to time.    Now don’t you think it would be interesting to see what an operation manual for a human being would look like?  I think for each of us we would likely have an operation manual longer than War & Peace.  Still with that little observation having been made, we at least weren’t designed with a bunch of buttons on our head that could be randomly activated.  I should try to find out who designed the clock radio that currently sits beside my bed and find just out just what they were thinking.  Were they drunk?  Were  they just trying to mess with the general population?  Why oh why do we need a clock with five time zones on it?

I f I wake up in New York’s time zone…does that bring me any closer to New York?  No, I don’t think so.  But on the upside the sun is shining.  Summer has arrived and yesterday as I walked up and down Columbia Street in New Westminster looking at all the beautiful cars on display at the annual Show & Shine the temperatures soared and it was hot and sticky just the way summer is supposed to be.

I will have a good conversation with the clock radio when I get home and see if we cannot reach a compromise.  I can forgive its design if it will look past my human failings.  I think that’s reasonable, yes?

Happy summer everyone…and if you are south of the equator…I guess in Australia this will be your winter?  Happy winter then!  I don’t know if you can ‘throw a shrimp on the barbie‘ in winter but hey, why not?

Have a great day and be kind to your clock radio!

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