I enjoyed my little shared fantasy with all of you the other day. We all do this, I am sure. I believe it to be a very human reaction when we see someone that we find physically attractive.
You know, the funny thing is, in the past I have had the person I was having my imaginary vis-a-vis with reciprocate the look and well, those little daydreams can become a bit of a nightmare. Particularly if they open their mouth and sound like a fog horn going off in the middle of a dense fog. There is this assault to the senses, suddenly I feel ‘caught’ and then I hit the panic button. I have been trapped in an event of my own making. Now that the person of my interest is interacting with me any interest on my part is quickly fading. As we all know, just because something looks good doesn’t necessarily mean it is good. How to back out delicately after offering up lusty gazes? Have you ever tried to tell someone that just because you were having a sexual fantasy about them…that you don’t really want to have sex with them. Awkward!
Sometimes a fantasy is better off just being what it is. A healthy little distraction…nothing more. So I do try to be discreet if I find myself enjoying this little pass time. Still, I suppose I would always take the chance of having them ‘catch’ me because it could in fact turn out to be something really beautiful, so there is that side to it as well.
The man / woman mystery. I am still single so I don’t really understand the dynamic. I can say, with all honesty, I have probably made every mistake there is to make regarding the man/woman thing and I have probably made the mistakes over and over in a variety of colours, shapes and sizes. If nothing else, I am consistent.
So I got to thinking…perhaps we should develop a code of conduct when we partake in such activities. The mind starts to wander…the grey matter begins to fire off certain neurons of the pleasurable variety and you are focusing on your said subject.
2.) Place bag over head.
3.) Proceed with fantasy
4.) Upon completion of fantasy, remove bag from head.
5.) Continue on as normal.
Now if said person of interest comes forward and says ‘I like you bag…were you wearing that for me?’ There is your out! If they have a voice that sounds like Hannibal Lechter in ‘Silence of the Lambs’ and you are creeped out big time, you can just smile and say ‘No, I am sorry. I was not wearing the bag for you.” Smile politely and leave the establishment saying to yourself ‘Thank God I had my bag with me today!”
There is no more embarrassing lusty gazes that were being displayed. I mean, everyone will know you are having a sexual fantasy, but no one will know who you are having the sexual fantasy about! Brilliant, don’t you think?
And you know, this could become quite the market. Personalized bags on head. I could sell them for $19.99 and if you call now, I will give you a second one free! And…they are biodegradable and made from recycled materials. But hurry, this is a limited time offer!
So the next time you walk into a restaurant…this is what you will see. I think this could catch on. Enjoy your day. Have a fabulous fantasy or two!