Two left feet and two right arms….


I did not make it to the gym this morning.  I had two very long days, back to back.  On Tuesday left the house at 5:20 AM, did my thing at the gym,  had my work day events and I did my run in the evening.   I then ran home and inhaled some dinner then met with my writing group a few blocks away until 10:00 PM.  Got up yesterday and did very much the same thing only after this job went over to an engineer’s office,  whose books I look after, then it was off to dance class.  So I got home about 9:45 PM.  When my alarm let out its plaintive little whine, I hit snooze twice…then thought ‘Rest…I just want to curl up in a little ball…all day.’  In other words, I took the extra 1/2 hour sleep before getting up.

Our busy lives.  I know personally the last few years I have been in this almost manic frame of mind in terms steamrolling ahead with virtually anything that remotely interests me.  I just seem to think that it won’t be a problem or that  I can fit it into my schedule.  I don’t mind being busy but I think on some level I should slow down, just a wee bit.  Sleep is at times necessary, or so it would seem.

Dance was fun.  I have another 3 weeks in that class then I will wrap it up.  When I finish up with this I will have done about 22 weeks of dance classes.  They are a combination of West African dance, belly dancing and tantric movements.  I can assure you, you get one hell of a workout.  I still very much resemble the Tin Man or a Pirate with a peg leg in my interpretation of said dance.

When we are doing this little move that requires us to circle around…sensually….I look like I’ve got a limp or something.  When we are instructed to ‘shake our bootie’…I seem to have this rattle and hum thing going on.  This actually surprises me because I am relatively well endowed in that area of my anatomy, yet I can’t seem to get it to move at times without great effort and exertion.   At times I do though and then she tells us to shake the top of our bodies.  Well now, I have just managed to get the bottom to shimmy like a jelly fish and now you want me to transfer this to the upper portion of the body and stop the movement occurring below, that by the way is moving by its own volition now.  Gravity alone is manifesting this movement.

No, sadly I don’t have that type of control.  And undulations…well, it would seem I can do a le petite undulation…but the one where you get the belly just moving snake like…all sexy and sinewy.  This could take awhile.  A very long while.

Now the premise of taking these classes was two fold….three actually.  Excellent workout and a nice change up from the usual exercise regime and have fun…a lot of fun.  Which in both cases I have had in abundance.  The other intention of this class was to work on my female confidence.  That I could be this powerhouse of womanly charm dripping with sexual mystery and leaving a sensual invitation in my wake. (Oops…there I go drifting off again.  I am told there is medication for this.) But it it is fun….very much so.  And perhaps I could make Pirates with Peg Legs….the musical…very sexy.  Yes?

It would seem that some women just pick up the sensual and  fluid motions required for this kind of dance.  Then you have women like me.   Two left feet….and a peg leg thrown in just to make things really interesting.

Now let’s discuss arm movements.  They….as we have been told by our instructor…are supposed to frame the body movement.  They will direct where the person watching is to look.  She shows us several examples and yes, she is correct.  So now I have to think about what I want to do with my arms.  Again there is a disconnect from what the brain is trying to tell the arms what to do.  I want my arms to be moving sensually and invitingly.  In the mirror they are jerky and agitated and flaying about in all directions. Hmmmm.  I try holding them out to the sides in kind of Cleopatra / Egyptian way.  Not quite.  The mirrored image is saying…’clear the runway…she about to take flight’.  And while I am trying to do something, anything with the arms the lower portion is circling in a jerky little movement on an invisible peg.  And I laugh…and I laugh…and I laugh some more.

I have, believe it or not, improved from 22 weeks ago.  Then I just looked like a mummy…with little or no movement whatsoever.  Couldn’t even get the damn knees to bend then!

Now the best movements are when we are doing a figure eight with our hips and we are supposed to lower ourselves down to the floor, go down on our knees, throw our arms behind us and begin undulations while in this position.  At this point, looking in the mirror is not an option.  I really don’t want to see how my body is interpreting this movement.  In fact, I am afraid to see how my body is interpreting this.

Next week we will be doing floor movements.  We get to try and embody the spirit of a big cat or a snake.  I have done this movement in previous classes.  Our instructor moves with cat like grace.  The movement is fluid and beautiful.  The first time I did this…I looked like I had been drinking heavily for 12 hours and was trying to find my way home.

But I continue to persevere.  I may not be a Dancing Queen…but it’s always fun to pretend.

Enjoy your day and get out there and shake it!

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